What do you get when you cross a…

By George Stahl
Special to the Sun

In the Bible book of Ecclesiastes, Moses writes, among other things, that whatever happens, past, present or future, it is not new. There is nothing new under the sun, he says. As we say today, thousands of years later, ‘Same ol’ same ol’.

Spoiler alert! Until this year, 2019 that is. Something new has taken place. 22 new things have been introduced to the world for the very first time. This may be sticking it a bit to Moses, but what else would you call a new life form emerging onto the world scene? Maybe life form is a little theatrical.

This year we have been given newly created beings that have never before graced the planet. Animal lovers all over the world have been gifted 22 new extraordinary breeds of dog to leer at, to covet, and to just melt into a ball of Jell-O at the sight of. They will want to really sink their teeth into these marvelous puppies of caninedom, and will jump at the chance to rub their anxious human paws all over them. Some say that the level of cuteness in these puppies is beyond anything they have seen so far, off the charts and into the history of cuddles.

What’s not to love about the product of merging a Pit Bull with a Husky to produce a Pitsky? A dog like that could easily be an aggressive and worthy opponent to any dog in the Iditarod Race in Alaska’s harshest, most foreboding territory.

What household would be complete without the family dog being a Yorkipoo? These sweet, compact, furry pups have an uncanny resemblance to the Ewoks who live on George Lucas’ Moon of Endor in Star Wars. Having the disposition and temperament of a Yorkshire Terrier, and the intelligence of a Poodle, they do well as household pets. They may even be able to help out with simple tasks around the house if they posses any of their hunter gather Ewok doppelgangers traits. That’s even more than a long shot, however.

If doggie slaves are not your thing, there has been an unusual interest in the Corgi breed, unprecedented by any other time in doggie breeding history. It’s no secret that the Queen of England has been a longtime lover of the Welsh Corgi. She has had 30 of the short legged little darlings since receiving her first on her 18th birthday. That was Susan, and all of the others have been decedents of the first. The palace had not been without a Corgi for 8 decades. Then, one night, in a moment of wanton abandonment, one of the Queens sisters’ dachshunds mated with a Royal Corgi, and Dorgi’s took over the palace. Today the Queen only has two dogs, and they are not pure bred! That rascal dachshund saw to that. No Knighthood in his future I’d guess.

The idea of using a Corgi to mix other breeds has stirred the imagination of breeders everywhere. This year, the Corgi was given pretty much free range and what has resulted could only be explained thru A.I. and we are not talking Artificial Intelligence. Artificial Insemination has been brought in for some of the extreme cases of mix breeds. For instances, another breed selected as a mate for the Corgi this year has been, of all dogs, a German Shepherd. This one was mixed in a Petri dish and given the Jurassic Park approach. It was engineered, and the result, although not a man eater, is impressive. It is called, a Sheporgi and it’s bound to get its own Sci-Fi movie, ‘Sheporginado.’

In its domination of speed breeding this year, our short legged little friend has also been A.I.’d with a Husky, bring something called a Horgi onto the canine radar. Then, in the old-fashioned way, the Wales Ironpup was mated with a Toy Poodle and, we were introduced to the, of course, you know what’s coming. The never to be forgotten, Corgi-poo. It didn’t stop there, though. Next, and for some reason last, the Corgi was thrown in with a Dalmatian and came out with a Dalcorgi. Cute, but probably not one you’d see around a fire station, let alone, riding on the engine.

Remember, there are pictures of these new breeds on the internet. So, it has to be true, right. Or is that not until the videos goes viral that it’s considered authenticated? Another thing that has to happen is that at least one of these 22 breeding experiments has to have turned out pretty gross. Bad or for all intended purposes, gone wrong at the very least. Okay then, it has to be this one. The idea was to breed a Mexican Chihuahua with a Pug. You know, like Frank the Pug in the Men in Black movies. Only this guy, even though he may look like an alien, doesn’t talk. But all you have to do is read between the lines on its face and you can see what it thinks about the union that created him. Oh well, 21 out of 22, that’s not so bad, I guess, unless you are the ‘Chug.’

We now have, as of this year, a Cocker Pei, German Pei, and a Basset Pei. Along with a Schnoodle, which looks more like an otter than a dog, a Bullpug, and a new breed that is really more fun to say than to look at, a Pomski, a Pomeranian Husky merger. There are more, but you will have to look them up yourself. Don’t be surprised when you see some that would fit in perfectly in the Bar Scene from Star Wars. Others could be extras in movies like The Fly.

So, Moses, it appears that you were right, up to a point, looking at these 2019 dogs, however, there is definitely something new under the sun.

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